Message Message Postmark  
Back oneFreeman Real Estate Ltd. Home Page
Home Page
Silly Blonde Jokes
 
Silly Blonde Jokes
Back to Humour Humour
Blond people dont take offence-Substitute any hair colour with the same net effect,


DEGREES OF     BLONDE:
>>> >>
>>> >>
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:
>>> >
>>> >>
>>> >>       FIRST DEGREE
>>> >>   A married couple were asleep when the     phone rang at 2 in the
>>> >> morning.
>>> >>   The wife     (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a
>>> >> moment
>>> >>   and said "How should I know, that's 200 miles     from here!" and
>>> >> hung up.
>>> >>   The husband said, "Who was     that?" The wife said, "I don't know,
>>> >> some
>>> >>   woman     wanting to know if the coast is     clear."
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:
>>> >
>>> >>
>>> >>       SECOND DEGREE
>>> >>   Two blondes are walking down the     street. One notices a compact
>>> >> on
>>> >>   the sidewalk     and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks
>>> >> in     the
>>> >>   mirror and says, "Hmm, this person looks     familiar." The second
>>> >> blonde
>>> >>   says, "Here, let me     see!" So the first blonde hands her the
>>> >> compact.
>>> >>       The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's
>>> >> me!"
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-
>>> >
>>> >>       THIRD DEGREE
>>> >>   A blonde suspects her boyfriend of     cheating on her, so she goes
>>> >>   out and buys a gun. She     goes to his apartment unexpectedly and
>>> >>   when she     opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead.
>>> >>   Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her     purse to take
>>> >> out
>>> >>   the gun, and as she does so, she     is overcome with grief. She
>>> >> takes
>>> >>   the gun
>>> and puts it to her head.
>>> >>   The boyfriend     yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!"
>>> >>   The blonde     replies, "Shut up, you're     next!"
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:
>>> >
>>> >>
>>> >>       FOURTH DEGREE
>>> >>   A blonde was bragging about her     knowledge of state capitals.
>>> >>   She proudly says, "Go     ahead, ask me, I know all of them."
>>> >>   A friend says,     "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?"
>>> >>   The blonde     replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:
>>> >
>>> >>       FIFTH DEGREE
>>> >>   What did the blonde ask her doctor when     he
>>> told
>>> >>   her she was pregnant? "Is it mine?"
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-
>>> >
>>> >>
>>> >>       SIXTH DEGREE
>>> >>   Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a     UCLA freshman,
>>> >>   sat in her US government class. The     professor asked Bambi
>>> >>   if she knew what Roe vs. Wade     was about. Bambi pondered
>>> >>   the question then finally     said, "That was the decision George
>>> >>   Washington had     to make before he crossed the     Delaware"
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:
>>> >
>>> >>
>>> >>       SEVENTH DEGREE
>>> >>
>>> Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find     her
>>> >>   house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned     the police
>>> >>   at once and reported the crime. The     police dispatcher
>>> >>   broadcast the call on the radio,     and a K-9 unit, patrolling
>>> >>   nearby was the first to     respond. As the K-9 officer
>>> >>   approached the house     with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran
>>> >>   out on the     porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his
>>> >> dog,
>>> >>   then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in     her hands,
>>> >>   she moaned, "I come home to find all my     possessions stolen.
>>> >>   I call the police for help, and     what do they do?
>>> >>   They send me a BLIND policeman."
>>> >>
>>> >>`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`**:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-.,_,.-:*`*:-
>>> >